It was a beautiful sunny day. We went out and picked up some things at the store, and went to Avery park, and then spent lunch playing at Papa's Pizza. Papa's pizza was a nice break from the McDonald's routine. It was, however, the location of (scary music here... duh, duh, duh) of one of my all time top WORST PARENTING FIRSTS!!
The place was pretty empty being a Monday lunchtime. We were the only ones in the play area for the first twenty minutes. Then a mom came with her daughter and two boys she was sitting (she came to tell me). The thing that troubled me was the oldest boy who was five attached really quickly to Lucy. They were all playing well together and it wasn't any thing. But then Lucy and this boy, Damian, were playing in this dark tunnel area that has a few open rooms and a passageway. I started suggesting for them to come out and play suchandsuch, you know, something else. Lucy tells me they are playing house. And the little boy sticks his head out and tells me that Lucy is his girlfriend! And I may be over-reacting, but he had a seriousness and deviancy to him. So, then I started 'harassing' the kids, pretending I was a monster and would reach through the little holes to try and get them, making a game of it. They would scream and laugh and run away. But it was all too dark and I couldn't tell what was going on, so pretty soon I just demanded Lucy and Willie to get out because it was time to go home (Willie had joined them in the play place when I started doing the 'monster game').
Man, I almost wanted to smack that kid. I was terrified that something had happened that I didn't see. And I don't know how to talk to Lucy about it exactly. And I'm half wondering is this an appropriate age to talk to her about birds and bees. How much to talk about? What exactly to warn her about? If this opens up any suggestions, I'd love to have them my way. Suggestions for good resources?
This afternoon, while we were home reading some books. I tried to casually start talking about the boy and what did they do while they played together. Her answers didn't cause any alarm in me, but I still wonder as she's still learning how to give details with her language.
Given this story, as if this picture is going to help our fears... But since we're on the subject of growing up too fast... I mentioned this on the phone, but here's a pic I snapped when Lucy found my make-up. I had given her a shower and Willie was still in his nap and I didn't have any clean clothes out for her, so I put her in my robe. She was playing with the my earrings while I was braiding her hair because the drawer was open. Then, she found some bronzing powder while I was turned away, and surprisingly put it on exactly right, in fact, better than I would have ever done. I kind of had to laugh at her good skill, and I played along and put eye make-up on and lipstick. Lately, she's been saying how she wants to "be like mommy" and she'll try to do everything that seems grown-up and like mommy does. Aye-yai-yai.
1 comment:
Man, that's a tough one! You can never be sure with older kids. It's not too early though to talk to her. My sister's youngest (3 yrs) already knows that she has "private parts" and that no one touches them. And Sean knows that his boy part is not a toy. :) Was that too much sharing? Good luck. I think Lucy would probably have told you if something happened that she thought was off.
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