My Homebirth

Little Izzy Belita Van Tress {those are nicknames} is almost two weeks old now. We don't have her name all totally figured out. She has more than one nickname as you can see, so... it's complicated.
When asked about my "birth story," I find myself going on and on and it sounds really complicated too. However, if you look at just the birth record, what the midwives write down on paper- it was all very simple. It was my easiest and fastest labor for sure. But I guess because it was my first homebirth, the thoughts and feelings going along with everything that happened are complex and deeply involved. I asked Jeremy to write up a list of interview questions to help me log down all my feelings about my homebirth experience, but I won't bother you with that in depth of details. Overall-
Am I glad I did a homebirth instead of birth in a hospital? Yes.
Was I happy with my homebirth experience? Yes and No.
Would I homebirth again? Yes, definitely, with some changes of course.
There were two big things that worried me with homebirthing (after getting over the initial "sticker shock" because it can seem like a lot of money to dish out... it is a lot of money to dish out) but the two things that worried me were-
*it being messy and staining our [new!] home :)
*feeling at high-risk and scared that I'm not at a hospital, especially during pushing/delivery phase
The latter of these fears was dispelled, I felt very safe the entire time and wasn't nervous that I wasn't at a hospital. The first fear though, got to me a little. But it probably wasn't as bad as I made it out to be.

So, I'll expound...

I was a week past my due date when I was in for an appointment my midwife asked if I wanted to strip membranes and I agreed. That was mid-afternoon and it was enough to start contractions. Contractions came about 2-3/an hour for the next 5 hours. They were not strong and I wondered if they would stop eventually. Jeremy had gone back into work actually, and so I went about with dinner and getting the kids to bed. Right after I had put Hallee down, the contractions started getting strong, enough that I had to sit down for them. Luckily Jeremy was already on his way home. He got home and put the older two kids to bed. And then we started timing contractions which were anywhere from 5-10 minutes apart. These kind of contractions went on for the next 2 hours. Even though I was consistently having contractions for 2 hours, they seemed to vary in intensity so I really wasn't convinced that I was progressing in labor very fast at all.
Around 10pm the intensity jumped up again and I had Jeremy call for the midwife to come. That next half hour was really the most intense. I was dilated to 9 when the midwives arrived. I had planned to use a birth stool, but they didn't bring it, and I ended up just delivering from my bed. Unfortunately, because they didn't know how far along I really was, and I was already on my bed going through transition, we didn't have time to prep the bed. At this point, in my head I remember thinking, Oh man, this is it and it's totally not what I had pictured my birth to be!!" I was frustrated and upset thinking about ruining my bed and not being in the position I wanted to be in. It probably wasn't as bad as I made it out to be. Quickly these thoughts were replaced with just pushing baby, so I guess I really can't say just how messy it was. I can say that no part of the house was damaged or defaced during any part of our homebirth experience. ;)
To hurry the story along... since I was ready to deliver, everyone got ready, I started pushing and less than 3 minutes later, there was Isabella! The midwives were only there about 20 minutes before baby was born. There was a lot more emotions and thoughts wrapped around this that I'm leaving out. The biggest disappointment about it afterall was just that Jeremy took more of back seat than he wanted to. He wanted to 'catch the baby' and be really involved, but because of the position I ended up being in, I needed him giving support to my back. Anyways, he was bummed that didn't work out. Well, the rest of the details...you'll have to ask me about that on your own. :)
Weighing in... 8lbs 2 oz...my biggest baby I still don't know how she got so clean even though she wasn't "whisked" away like in the hospital.
Baby's first bath: a tradition for Daddy to do it

Baby is super cute, easy to love! The kids all adore her!
The big 4, we're a family of 6!!! holy cow!
Just the girls. We thought Hallee would not like the baby, but quite the contrary. Hallee had to hold the baby. And when I tried to take her back, she had the biggest fit ever. I ended up letting her hold the baby 3 times, she threw a fit everytime. Guess it's love at first sight.

End of the Road

Although this blog post really had it's meaning a couple weeks ago, I'll go ahead and post it late anyway.

I've come to the end of my pregnancy. Waiting for the big moment now. Funny thing is, there are some other things coming to the end of their road as well.
The biggest one is Hallee become a full-time walker! She has really blossomed with this new freedom too. I'm glad to see the end of the crawling phase come before baby is born. That was my secret wish, and what a nice girl for giving her mother her wish! With a couple of road trips coming up though, I think we'll be investing in the those backpack leashes for her. I swore I would never put one of those on my child, but I'm feeling an inkling of being overwhelmed when I think about tackling tasks with 4 kids by myself. scarey!
There was another end of the road last week- one that was more on the sad side. Jeremy's mom came to visit and help with the baby, but- sorry to spoil the ending- she ended up having to leave with no baby born yet. She arrived on Tuesday, 2 days before due date, and I even had a couple contractions that night. Then nothing really. I had a midwife appointment on that Thursday and I was dilated to a 2 and not really effaced much, but definetly "soft." :) I always laugh when they use that word. The midwife said she would be really surprised if she saw me again in a week for a regular apointment, in other words, she thought I would deliver soon. She told Jeremy, "no more riding your bike to work."
Well, everyone became very anxious for the baby to come; minus me I'd say, someone's got to keep a calm head. Each day was spent waiting for contractions, every conversation seemed to be about how I was feeling, Jeremy giving me orders to do certain labor-inducing activities. It was actually quite torturous. ;) With Jeremy taking the car everyday, Grandma and us were left at home to do nothing too exciting. It added to the torture. I crazily thought of things to do- one of which was making a big card- more about that later.
Luckily, we at least at Lucy's ballet recital that weekend. Another "end of the road." It was very fun to be a part of the dance recital. Lucy was very excited. I'm not sure how many dancers there were, but it was a long recital! I hadn't anticipated part of the mom's job to keep the kids entertained yet quiet as they waited for their turn to perform. I hadn't brought anything to do nor any snacks. Thankfully, some of the other moms were more prepared than I was. I was able to think of one game for the girls to do, "Ballerina, Ballerina, where's your flower?" (a twist on the Doggie doggie, where's your bone game.) It was quite the hit with girls and moms because it kept them sitting down, quiet, and entertained for a good 40 minutes or so. Lucy did a great job on her dances. I was surprised because she had missed a couple of the last practices and I wasn't sure she would remember anything. They have a leader to follow of course, but she still did a great job. You can see in the video how she was one of the 'those' kids that runs off stage as soon as she's done dancing, an excited exit to daddy, not to script, but it did make the audience laugh.

After the recital, the focus was back on having the baby. :( Grandma's flight was scheduled to leave Tuesday night. Sunday and Monday were tense and sad realizing that nothing much was happening. Monday was spent talking about how and if she could take another flight and stay a few more days. Unforunteately, there were just no signs I would go into labor and it didn't seem worth the money to change the ticket. We finished a huge card for the residents at the elderly community where she manages. I had started making ice cream cone cards for all the residents, then Grandma suggested making just one big card. We came up with the phrase, "I scream, You scream, We all scream" and the inside of the card said, "Is the baby here yet?" There were 37 ice cream cones, each with one of the resident's name on it, on the inside of the card.
The baby was eventually born. :) She ended up coming the day after Grandma left. That Sunday was Father's day and we were having ice cream cones for dessert. I had to take a picture of all of us with our cones. It fit in too well with our card for the elderly residents and I had to send the update: "Here's the latest scoop...Isabella Van Tress." We're very happy with this new little sister. I'm sure you want to hear every last detail (not really) so I'll be sure to write my birth post next.

Oh, and the last 'end of the road' was... the end of my 30th year. Happy 31st birthday with homemade apple pie.

Wait...Rewind!

Wait, holy cow- I'm due in just a week and I'm not ready to move on! I've had lots of mixed emotions these last few months as so much has been happening and I'm just barely beginning to see it and already another big new thing is on the way! I hope every baby in the army will not be so crazy. (Well, no, I'm not sure I endorse the ramifications of that statement.)

I almost cried the other day thinking how much of a baby Hallee still is while about to have another baby any day. I've done this before! How did I do this before??
I've been spending a lot of time with her lately just wanting to be with her to celebrate everything she's learning and discovering, knowing that with another baby those moments might be fewer. The girl has been cracking us up with her silly personality. She's super curious yet a cuddly homebody at the same time. Just yesterday she started to stand up! And today, she took her first steps. This feels so much bigger than the other two I guess because of how long it's taken her. Even though I know there's nothing wrong with her AT ALL (emphasis added for the dude who asked if she was slow, because she wasn't walking at 18months- boo to you Mister!), but I'm so happy she decided to take that risk and felt joy in doing it. It was a moment all 4 of us shared together watching her decide to stand up. We were doing songs during some circle time (it's so cute that Hallee will come sit with us for our little circle time) and the kids were standing up dancing while doing a song. She didn't want to miss the action, I guess, and just stands up on her own and starts doing a little bounce dance. It was so funny/awesome!! We were all together again when she was taking some steps today. Even Lucy and Willie were so excited for her seeming to understand this grandeur of what she's been through to be able to get to this accomplishment. So cute. Awww, families.

So, even though this is supposed to be a rewind in pictures...blogger, of course, can't load them up. So if I could share some pictures with you, here's what they would be about:
*Cute pictures of Lucy and Willie enjoying park time at Lake rim, and also at the grand opening of the Botanical Gardens.
*Day at the Horse Derby- most excellent 4 for 1 ticket I've ever bought. Picture was of the 3 kids eating our picnic lunch. Hallee stuck under layers of blankets protecting her cast from getting dirty or wet. This event was just 3 days after her fall. I was going to just not go, but decided late the night before, it just couldn't be missed. I'm so glad our first outing with cast went well.
*Huge Python at the nature center corraling the kids- talk about scary!
*Lucy's big 5th birthday- not anything what we tried to plan, but it was fun. We also happened to find a trampoline just a week before, so extra fun there!
*The Easter bunny photo, taken the day a tornado ran through town. So glad we were blessed to have escaped ANY kind of devastation from that ordeal.
*Placing flags on graves of the Veterans in preparation for Memorial Day.
*Baby shower for Jamie. So fun! How the heck did she start labor before me?! Unfortunetly, this wasn't a good thing and I hope it all goes well for her!
*A nice big belly shot for you. One last shot before baby comes. I'm so bummed that I never lined up a photographer for this pregnancy & newborn photos. sigh. I never can get on that it seems.
I guess the rest of the picture are just preschool stuff. I've been able to meet some super nice homeschooling moms and hope that we will be able to start a good support group for each other. I'm not sure what school will be like next year, I still have so much to do there! :(

Oh yeah- I got a few pictures on here-
Our celebration night out after Hallee got her cast off. Such a cute munchkin!

Belly Belly Belleeee (when you coming off btw?)

Lucy creating Barbie's "Baptism dress" from a paper napkin (we're talking HOURS of fun here!)

Easter egg hunt, Hallee still in a cast.

Cute brother and sister! Botanical Gardens with great face painters!